Josh's Crosstime Salute

In 1991, two years after my marriage, my wife and I made a journey to her first college to celebrate the reunion of her classmates from her freshman and sophomore years. She transferred out of that college for any number of reasons, not the least of which was that the major she settled on was not one they supported.

She spent two years there vs. the three at her second college, her "alma mater." She graduated in '87, not '86. But after 1991, we repeated the experience in '96, '01, and now again in '06. We have not gone to reunions at the other place in '92, '97, or '02. I doubt that '07 would see a change in that trend.

Her first college was an all women's college (a girl's school, if you will). I was well familiar with it from years past, having known many a student from it and having 'gone out with' one, to grossly understate the case. The academics they presented were solid. The communities they built were more so, as far as I have ever been able to tell.

As a spouse rather than an alum, it is in some ways easier to cross "class" lines and mingle with those of earlier and later classes. The same sense I've gotten from Susan's group, I observe with those others as well. Susan's classmates were/are an extraordinary group of women. I think, though, that they are unexceptional as those groups go. Yes, there are probably those who did not bond with others, who did not get the community and communion that is so much a part of the experience she had - but more than at the overwhelming bulk of co-ed institutions, I think the communion is expected.

Not everybody likes everybody. There is not universal agreement even where there is dominant opinion. (There are folks there who voted for Bush and still have no doubts about their decision.) But there is love and caring and thought and feeling and consideration. Memorials to those who have passed are paid in the homilies and tales - but they are told, too, in shows and reviews and paintings. The impact of their lives is discussed and explored, not in a way that makes this exceptional, but in a way that makes such exploration a part of daily life among these women.

The class of '86 did a show as they did 5 years ago. It held less force in some ways, essentially because a force of nature had been taken from them. (http://joshwriting.livejournal.com/44067.html) While there had been a memorial service to Jilline, the echoes of her passage were felt as keenly in the show. It was a different kind of show than the prior tour de force, more reflective and a celebration of life, less a celebration of talent.

The show was about what it is like to be 40 or just past, the pluses and minuses. There were poingant moments and funny bits. Punctuation was provided by letters to "Sister Seven," a mock-advice columnist and her oh so to the point responses. The writing and the songs spoke to hopes and dreams, pleasures and pains, solitude and community. The group did not formally record the show, which is a pity - I have indicated an interest in being able to share some specifics from it because I think it will speak to many of the folks I know - esp. in the Sheroes community, but not only there.