Tikkun Olam
Aug. 27th, 2004 11:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
joshwritingToday I attended the funeral of an acquaintance of mine, the sister of a friend. I had not seen or talked to Sonia in a long, long time. I had not talked to her sister, my friend, in a fairly long time, either, though not even as close.
There were parts of her history that I knew, but more that I did not know. But the parts I did not know (like her founding a rape crisis center) are in keeping with her spirit, from the little I knew.
Tikkun Olam concerns the notion of healing the world. It was very much a part of Sonia's life, as I understand it. It is, for Jews, the act of a 'righteous person.' The notion of charity, the rabbi explained, is that it is a voluntary thing, a choice to do good and feel good for it. The righteous man does it because it is what is supposed to be done.
There is no reward. There is only the internal reward of doing what you believe in, doing what G-d commands one to do. Or, for those who do not believe in G-d, then it is what you do out of a sense that it is right.
I like to think that I work to heal the world. I know that I screw up at times, that I fail in these efforts. I know that sometimes I succeed, without knowing, or with more effect than I know.
This is an instance in which, to an extent, I have failed. THis is a friend whom I have known for about 27 years, a close friend for many years - the closest at times - and yet, I have no talked to her, beyond social pleasantries, for a fair number of years.
Nor is she alone in this regard.
That does not mean that the relationship is not strong; it does not mean that there is no connection... it means that as far as that relationship is concerned, the time is wasted.
When she was on her way in state, she called and told me a bit of what was going on - and I indicated my sorrow first, and then asked how I could help. "How did I know those would be the first words out of your mouth?"
This is how I want to be thought of - but two days ago, instead, it was "Where are you?" I had forgotten a commitment I had made just the night before. My inability to remember such things causes pain, regardless of intentions.
How do I heal the parts of the world that I have hurt?
I don't know. I do know this: that I do a bad job of showing people that I love them, that I care about them, does not mean that it is not so.
Unfortunately, that it is so does not mean that I have not caused pain.
Ultimately, though, I must try to make things better.
There were parts of her history that I knew, but more that I did not know. But the parts I did not know (like her founding a rape crisis center) are in keeping with her spirit, from the little I knew.
Tikkun Olam concerns the notion of healing the world. It was very much a part of Sonia's life, as I understand it. It is, for Jews, the act of a 'righteous person.' The notion of charity, the rabbi explained, is that it is a voluntary thing, a choice to do good and feel good for it. The righteous man does it because it is what is supposed to be done.
There is no reward. There is only the internal reward of doing what you believe in, doing what G-d commands one to do. Or, for those who do not believe in G-d, then it is what you do out of a sense that it is right.
I like to think that I work to heal the world. I know that I screw up at times, that I fail in these efforts. I know that sometimes I succeed, without knowing, or with more effect than I know.
This is an instance in which, to an extent, I have failed. THis is a friend whom I have known for about 27 years, a close friend for many years - the closest at times - and yet, I have no talked to her, beyond social pleasantries, for a fair number of years.
Nor is she alone in this regard.
That does not mean that the relationship is not strong; it does not mean that there is no connection... it means that as far as that relationship is concerned, the time is wasted.
When she was on her way in state, she called and told me a bit of what was going on - and I indicated my sorrow first, and then asked how I could help. "How did I know those would be the first words out of your mouth?"
This is how I want to be thought of - but two days ago, instead, it was "Where are you?" I had forgotten a commitment I had made just the night before. My inability to remember such things causes pain, regardless of intentions.
How do I heal the parts of the world that I have hurt?
I don't know. I do know this: that I do a bad job of showing people that I love them, that I care about them, does not mean that it is not so.
Unfortunately, that it is so does not mean that I have not caused pain.
Ultimately, though, I must try to make things better.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2004-08-28 08:29 am (UTC)Are you a practicing Jew?
no subject
Date: 2004-08-28 10:36 am (UTC)I got a Palm Pilot, and learned to check the Palm Pilot religiously before making any commitments, and many times through-out the day. It helps a lot.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-28 06:49 pm (UTC)And there is the pain I can cause in other ways, too... but yes, I am much better than I used to be, through my date book.