joshwriting: (Default)
[personal profile] joshwriting
Over on Sheroes, there have been a few threads on related topics. Pictures of your S.O. and how many have you had and other such things.

As I read responses, it seemed to me that folks had radically different ideas of what a significant other entails. So, I ask you, what makes somebody your significant other, not merely the person you are dating or your boy/girlfriend.

What makes it significant?!

Date: 2006-06-27 01:52 am (UTC)
siderea: (Default)
From: [personal profile] siderea
I thought "SO" was a superset of AotA.

AotA?

Date: 2006-06-27 02:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] etherial.livejournal.com
Is that the plural of iota?

Re: AotA?

Date: 2006-06-27 03:17 am (UTC)
siderea: (Default)
From: [personal profile] siderea
All of the Above.

Date: 2006-06-27 03:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eveninghawk.livejournal.com
I personally would define my significant other as the person I am dating... though I think folks tend to see it as more of an "official" term than "person I am dating." I think the term is a way to get around being specific about the gender of the person you are with, for whatever reason it is that you don't feel the need to be specific. The other term that gets used this way is "partner"... though that word can imply a deeper level of commitment.... so I've always thought of "SO" as a synonym for "boyfriend" or "girlfriend" and "partner" as a synonym for "husband" or "wife."

course, if you don't have a person who fits those categories, it seems as though a person could fill in the blank with whatever takes up most of their time.

Date: 2006-06-27 03:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mirmie.livejournal.com
I always think of significant other as a very general term that encompasses all sorts of romantic relationships.

Date: 2006-06-27 07:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zilsrainydayz.livejournal.com
sig·nif·i·cant
adj.
1)Having or expressing a meaning; meaningful.
2)Having or likely to have a major effect; important
3)Fairly large in amount or quantity
4)probably caused by something other than mere chance


According to this I could perhaps define it as 1)
someone who means a lot to you in the sense of romantic relationships. Perhaps not just little fling, but a semi-serious relationship, though not extreme?

2)Someone who influences your life, who you're close to in a relationship such as this. Someone who will change your life, perhaps, in a way that you will remember, even if you are to break up at a later date, it's not a relationship that broke up after two weeks or two months that you hardly include in your list.

3)a fairly large (serious) relationship, though not necessarily very.
4) this can go along with if you believe in fate and that you're meant to be together, or you're meant to know each other... or something.

You could perhaps get various meanings for "significant other" than what I ATTEMPTED to say, just from those definitions.

What I find confusing is the "other" bit... The other part of you? the other person that's more than just another person? your other girl/boyfriend (as in, out of all your past gfs/bfs) that's important to you?

Date: 2006-06-27 09:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jenanoelle.livejournal.com
..that they take up a significant part of your time/money ;)

(not an extremely serious answer, but it *is* 5am..)

Date: 2006-06-27 10:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dmnsqrl.livejournal.com
If I am using the term 'significant other', I'd probably not be talking about someone I was "dating" (although I have to be in a particular not-usual-for-me place to be 'just dating', I have a strong bias to forming a strong emotional connection and see-this-person-as-a-primary-focus-in-my-life with one person) but any time where I would be referring to one person having a particular unique connection with me which is also romantic in nature... I would be comfortable using the term "significant other" about that person.

Date: 2006-06-27 11:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] etherial.livejournal.com
Someone becomes your SO when others know to expect you to be together when they see you.
(deleted comment)

Date: 2006-06-27 04:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] superfinemind.livejournal.com
Regard to the first part, could it be related to the psychological "Other"?

Date: 2006-06-27 04:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] superfinemind.livejournal.com
"SO" is easier to say than girlfriend, boyfriend, sometimes-whatever, um-friend, or most other things. And easier to type. Expansion of "OSO" is clunky, but not as much as "boyfriend's other girlfriend."

The long form is unspecific enough and the short form chummy enough that it's unlikely to offend/squidge/whatever mostly anybody-- I don't like being asked about "lovers," for instance. I just don't like the word.

A universally generic term: more-than-just-friends regardless of nuances. People will understand that the person is special in a particular way to you without you going into details of how you define the relationship. A catch-all.

Avoids pesky details-- an SO can be a person you're sleeping with but not dating, without having to go TMI with somebody you've just met. Many of my boys, I wouldn't have called it "dating" except in polite company, because we never went on terribly many dates-- out for meals and movies and so forth. Or maybe it's mutually expressed interest, but nothing's actually happened: I almost never see Kitten, but she's definitely on my SO list.

What makes it significant: this person is special to you, is what makes them significant. Worthy of mention. Short list.

Counter question: what is the difference between a significant (noteworthy) friend, and a significant other? Where does that line fall? What makes it Other?
(deleted comment)

Date: 2006-06-27 04:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] superfinemind.livejournal.com
*eyebrows* ...because I can blather about significant others?
(deleted comment)

Date: 2006-06-27 06:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] superfinemind.livejournal.com
*laugh* Okay. *smile* Either way is fine.

And, yeah, the interests more reflect me-- the rest of the userinfo is for the character I RP under that journal with.

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